As a parent, when I think about trust, I cannot help but think about my children. When they were little, we would encounter the trust issue over the” bigger” things in their life like jumping into our arms at the deep end of the pool or holding on to the back of the bike while they learned to ride But now that they are older, one of the recurring challenges we face with them is believing us over what their friends tell them. They may not think of it as a trust issue, but it is. As a parent, it can be frustrating when we are asking them for the hundredth time why they would believe what a friend (who, by the way, has only lived on the planet as long as they have), over us, their parents, who have lived on the planet much longer and have never lied to them. I believe God has used my children to show me how I, too, possess that same tendency when it comes to believing Him over anyone or anything else. Like, when I’m in a situation and I’m tempted to lie because I believe that it won’t really do any damage to the person I’m lying to, or when I worry about a situation or relationship because I don’t believe that God is really in control. So, my questions are: For anyone, what do you do to mature through the trust issue with God in your own life? And, for the parents out there, what is the one thing you wish your children would grasp about why they should trust you over everyone else in their young lives?
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The hardest part that I have observed is that my children do not always realize that I have their best interests at heart. Do they sometimes have to “learn the hard way”?
I have young kids (almost 4 yrs and 1 yr), so the peer pressure thing hasn’t really hit our household yet (fortunately). However, I already see my four year old hear something I tell him, process it, and then discard the information to do what he wants. It’s frustrating, but God has used it as an illustration for my relationship with Him. How many things do I hear taught on Sunday or discussed in my small group that I’m just not doing. The problem isn’t that I don’t know what to do; I think at the root I’m the same as my son. I somehow just think that I know better. So how do I change this and trust God more? For me, I’ve seen a direct correlation between my ability to trust and how much I’m obeying. The more I simply do what I know I’m supposed to, the easier it is to do so when I question or doubt.
I know, for me, my ability to trust is effected by the level of dishonesty I have encountered in my life. Even the “small” issues of broken promises by my parents growing up. “We will go to the lake this weekend” turns into “We need to wait for a better weekend to go, there is too much to do around here right now”. I learned that if it didn’t happen right at the time it was promised, it was increasingly unlikely to happen. So, now at 43 y/o, I return to doubt, fear and frustration when God moves slower in answering my prayers than I have in mind. One of the ways I have grown through this is to remain consistent in my reading of the word. Even if I don’t get an “answer”, God is faithful to place living examples of what I have read through my day (the very day I read it). In this way I know that God is paying attention to my life and is intimately involved. This, in turn, increases my trust that He is involved and addessing my prayer requests - even when I can’t see it. Another way God teaches me is by being involved in other people’s lives. It is so much easier for me to see God working in the lives of others, than it is in mine. This is likely do to the fact that I am so emotionally tied to the outcomes of my prayer requests that I often miss the answer. Why? Because I do not recognize something I am not looking for. I continue to learn that my limited “multiple choice” requests to God is still betraying a level of distrust in our relationship. God demonstrates that He is way too big to be limited by my finite way of viewing my world. He answers in ways that I haven’t even considered, and my trust, my faith, grows.
The words surrender and trust seem to fit very well together. Try surrendering your issues to God, and make up your mind you are not going to worry about them any longer. As God begins to work those issues out, your faith in Him will grow and you will learn to trust Him more and more.
Isn’t it funny how God uses our children to show us where we are lacking? I was just thinking about Elaine’s example about children jumping off the deep end of the pool into their parents arms and the lack of faith and thought of my 4yo who will not jump into my arms. God just spoke to me about my trust in Him….I cannot teach my children trust in God if I, first, don’t trust him. What an eye opener!!!!